Happiness or Comfort? Why We Avoid Change in Gestalt Therapy
When the solution is right in front of us
Many times the solution is right in front of our eyes…
and yet we still do not see it.
Or worse: we sense it, but prefer not to look at it directly.
Jean-Paul Sartre, the French philosopher, once said:
“The difference between unconsciousness and bad faith is very subtle.”
Unconsciousness means not knowing.
Bad faith means suspecting… and still looking the other way.
Why do we avoid looking at what we already know?
If we were fully aware of what we do — to ourselves, to others, to the world —
perhaps we would not be able to continue acting the way we do.
And here lies the core of the issue: there are advantages to maintaining our own self-deceptions.
In many processes of Gestalt therapy and personal growth, an important question appears:
what do I gain by keeping things exactly as they are?
Each person has their own reasons:
avoiding conflict
always needing to be right
not touching painful emotions
avoiding real responsibility for our actions
Generalization as an excuse
Speaking in abstract terms, generalizing, pointing out what “others do” is often a way to avoid speaking about yourself.
It is a way of not getting involved.
Of remaining on the surface.
In Gestalt therapy, we prefer to speak in the first person.
Because real change begins when you become personally involved.
When you stop hiding behind empty discourse and begin expressing what you truly feel and need.
The easy path is tempting… but misleading
Often we choose what seems easier:
going with the flow
pleasing others
staying silent
avoiding too many questions
But what is easy is not always what is good for us.
Sometimes the easy path is a trap.
A comfort that can cost us something very valuable:
our authenticity, our joy, and our true life.
Are you living from desire or from avoidance?
Between a smile that hides an uncomfortable truth and a “it doesn’t matter if I do it again”…
a whole life can slip away.
True freedom is not about doing what feels most comfortable.
It is about daring to look, feel, and decide from a more conscious and authentic place.
A process to free yourself from your own traps
Gestalt therapy can help you identify those personal traps that today may seem to protect you,
but that in reality keep you away from yourself.
Learning to see your own mechanisms is one of the fundamental steps in therapeutic work and personal change.
If you feel that the time has come to begin living from a freer and more authentic place,
this path can support you.
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